Reaching a convergent state in life at some point we have enough life experience that we start converging on hour on our attractive state as it were and we converge on our steady state in life and who knows when that is for everyone? For me it occurred. I would say starting in my mid 30s and really that idea solidified for me in only when I was 43 when I had a sudden shock as it were, and realise that I would do just fine on my own that was my sort of internal steady state I don't need anyone I was fine on my own and maybe that is really where things like buddhism can teach us a lot because existence of the mind and so your reality is is is one for us to recognise the patterns that shape our lives, how they allow us to reach the steady state does everyone I can't say I can only speak for my own state of mind.